Lady Bathory Mistress of Doom

Family Portrait

Russell Brand and Katy Perry may have just tied the knot but they're already adding to their family. The newly minted couple adopted teen heart throb, Justin Bieber at the American Music Awards Sunday night.

Here's what the mop haired pop singer had to say about his new family, "I'm really looking forward to having Mr. and Mrs. Brand take care of me," said Bieber. "Mrs. Brand's a total upgrade from my mom and Mr. Brand and I can talk dick and p***y jokes all day. Not only that, but they'll let my bff Usher come over to play video games whenever I want."

Bieber went on to say, "Now that I'm the biggest star in music I felt like I needed a family upgrade."

What a little asshole!

Tiny Print: This Story Most Likely Isn't True, Believe It At Your Own Risk.